Post by Deleted on Mar 15, 2019 1:11:03 GMT -5
A DREAM YOU CAN'T ESCAPE
Sparkpaw
LIGHTNINGCLAN - APPRENTICE - 18 MOONS
It was likely he wasn't ever even going to receive a warrior name the way things were playing out.
Sparkpaw sat outside Firestar's den, his tail flicking in irritation as he waited. They probably aren't saying one good word about me in there. He assumed angrily, golden eyes shunning the accusing glances his clanmates gave him in passing. It was still snowing lightly, and his wounds burned from the run-in with the two StoneClanners despite the efforts of LightningClan's medicine cats. No doubt they were annoyed with him too. Sparkpaw tried to ignore flashbacks of his recent expedition, though images of blood-stained snow and the light-colored StoneClanner's crippled body haunted his mind.
Should he have just let them steal the rabbit?
The last thing Sparkpaw wanted to do was get chewed out for protecting and promoting LightningClan's wellbeing again. He set up a strong patrol to take back Sun Stones, and what they had lacked in experience, they made up with determination and the element of surprise. It would have worked too if...
Nevermind. Sparkpaw thought bitterly, scowling as he remembered his previous altercation with LightningClan's leader. At least this would be more...private. He couldn't stand the thought of a public denouncing again, though the conception of being summoned into her den alone made Sparkpaw's fur ruffle uncomfortably. She could kill me and no one would see a thing. He mused sardonically, trying to quench the fires of nervousness with humor.
The ginger and white tom sunk down to his belly, laying in the snow. His mentor was taking quite some time in there. The more Sparkpaw sat in waiting, the more he felt apprehension quicken his heartbeats and tighten his chest. The tom rested his chin on his paws, staring blankly ahead.
Realization of his situation sent Sparkpaw reeling into an abyss of emptiness.
He should have been a warrior six moons ago. Sparkpaw really was happy for Nutfur, but jealousy sent his soul up in flames at the slightest reference of his peers' successes. He took the fall for it, the journey to reclaim Sun Stones. It was his idea, but what was the point? Why did he always make himself the one to blame? The only thing he ever got out of it was punishment and consequence, and while he was held back, he had the joy of seeing all of his friends and family push ahead of him, achieving the dreams he wanted for himself.
All he ever desired was to be the most admired warrior, but LightningClan's decrying strengthened his defiance, pushing him deeper into an increasingly inescapable refractory.
The ginger spotted tom noticed Sunnyheart exit from Firestar's den, though the fiery stare the warrior gave him sent Sparkpaw's fur on end. The apprentice evaded his mentor's lour, or at least attempted too as he pushed past, slipping into Firestar's den quietly.
The air felt heavy. A grim glower shadowed Sparkpaw's face as he sat down. He wrapped his tail tightly around his paws, vacant eyes tracing each and every detail of the ground before him.
The young tom didn't have the courage to look. Not yet.
After a few dreadfully silent moments, Sparkpaw's eyes rose slowly from the plain refuge of soil to the scorching, tenacious depths of Firestar's gaze.
It's probably too late to request public shaming. The apprentice thought caustically, faltering before the face of justice.