|
|
Post by Insidious on Oct 6, 2016 23:34:27 GMT -5
There wasn’t a contest on whom Pinkcloud’s death had been the hardest on, but there was no denying that her undyingly faithful sister, Bluejay, would be an unrivaled winner. She thought about the pink-eyed she-cat every single day, but lately it was good thoughts more than bad thoughts. There weren’t very many of her Clanmates that she felt comfortable discussing it with, because those closest to Pinkcloud were also those that were the most traumatized by what had happened to her; she didn’t want to unbury hard, unaddressed feelings on account of her simply missing her, but she feared she’d overwhelm herself with the sheer emotion behind it all if she didn’t find someone that she could talk to—and someone who understood.
When she spotted the familiar black and white pelt of Pinkcloud’s mate, and Nightpaw’s father, sauntering across camp, she quickly cut a path across camp towards him. He was exactly what she needed right now: He was close to Pinkcloud, but nevertheless able to function when the conversation was turned onto her. She didn’t want to be selfish and remind him of his grief, but she felt like it was something that needed to be talked about every once in a while lest good cats, just like her sister, be forgotten about entirely. There wasn’t anyone else she could think of that could be what she needed right now, and no matter how little he deserved her respect in hindsight, it was something that he possessed wholeheartedly until she was given a reason to take it away from him.
“Hello, Magpiewing.” She greeted the tom with a smile as she neared his side. “How are you holding up lately? I thought it had been a while since I checked in with you.” Bluejay gave him her undivided attention, and she searched his expression for signs of pain—it was getting harder and harder for her to turn off her instincts as a medicine cat when it was appropriate to do so. Pinkcloud hadn’t gotten a chance to tell Bluejay about what Magpiewing was really like before she died, and since she was hardly the type to make a fuss about it in StarClan, the medicine cat was oblivious to his wrongdoings. It seemed like he was getting closer with a friend of his, Mockingbird, which had made Bluejay distinctly uncomfortable for a short period of time; now she saw the good in it, however, for it was wrong to want him to dwell on the hurt of his loss for the rest of his life. Pinkcloud would want him to be happy.
Date: leaf-fall eleven
Words: 435
Tag: @zen |
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Nov 1, 2016 12:31:08 GMT -5
Now tell me all about your pain, down to the detail...
A visit to his mate and offspring had ended. Magpiewing was rather pleased with how kits were developing. Owlkit in particular seemed a promising young tom, but he was determined that each of his kits would become something worthwhile. Ravenkit and Berrykit lacked Owlkit's subtlety, but that didn't mean they didn't have their own uses. Berrykit was foolishly fearless, which meant he was likely to put himself into many interesting situations as he grew. And Ravenkit's complete lack of tact, and lack of caring that she had none, meant she would be a thorn in many cats' sides, which would be amusing in itself to witness.
But it was Owlkit's future that was the least predictable. He kept many things to himself, but Magpiewing could see his mind working behind his eyes, processing everything he saw and heard. It reminded him of himself as a kit. And he was already learning to play his part as the rest of the Clan would expect of him. It took Magpiewing longer to learn that lesson. He was eager to watch all of his kits grow, to see how what they would become, but Owlkit was quickly becoming his favorite of the litter. He wondered if he should tell his kits, once they were a bit older, see how they reacted.
Would Owlkit be pleased or apathetic, knowing he had his father's favor? Would he upset Ravenkit so that she turned her ire to him? Would Berrykit continue on as he always did, or would he seek out more and more danger in an effort to tear his father's attention away from his brother? The possibilities were endless and amusing, though he couldn't say how Mockingbird might react to his little... experiment on their kits. Such a simple thing, his favoritism... and yet it was a ripple that had the potential to create storms. And what if he suddenly informed of them of their brother, Nightpaw? What if he suddenly turned his attention to his firstborn? How would they react then?
It was as his thoughts turned to Nightpaw that Bluejay sought him out, her voice tearing him from his thoughts as he made his way from the nursery and across camp. He stopped as she greeted him, giving her a pleasant smile, “Hello, Bluejay.” He had wondered initially, after his rejection of Pinkcloud, if his former mate had told her sister anything of that conversation. However, as time went on and Bluejay treated him as she always had, he became convinced she knew nothing, which was surprising. The sisters had been incredibly close, told each other everything. And he was aware of how protective Bluejay had been over her albino sister. He was certain she would have said or done something immediately if Pinkcloud had told her what he'd done.
“It has been a while, hasn't it?” he mewed softly as he slipped a guarded mask of pain onto his features, casting his yellow eyes away briefly as if uncomfortable with what he was about to say, “I... have been meaning to thank you.” He cast a quick glance around, as if checking for some cat, though he already very well knew Nightpaw was no where near them, “I know... what I'm doing... it's not fair. To Nightpaw, I mean.” He turned back to meet Bluejay's bright blue eyes, his own glazed with the pain of loss, “But I just can't be there... every time I see him, it hurts.” He shook his head, looking at his paws as if ashamed, “So thank you... for being there for him. You're far stronger than I am.”
He looked at Bluejay suddenly, his wide with worry, “Oh, I've only just thought about it. Bluejay, you don't think I'm absolutely terrible, do you? I know... I know I moved quickly with Mockingbird, but I was so lost... Mockingbird helped me so much, after....” He trailed off, clearly not wanting to talk about Pinkcloud's death. “I just wanted that family that she and I were supposed to have... I wanted to forget all the pain.... I am terrible, aren't I?” He looked pleadingly at Bluejay, as if begging her to deny it.
Don't say it's love, your fragile heart feeds my contempt.
Insidious
|
|
|
|
Post by Insidious on Nov 15, 2016 12:54:06 GMT -5
 Medicine Cat of TreeClan, 24 Moons, She-Cat The pain she expected to see slowly fell across his features, and as much as she wanted him to rise above his suffering, it was nice to be reminded that she wasn’t the only one plagued by the difficulties of moving on from the loss of a loved one. Pinkcloud had meant so much to her, but she also meant a lot to the whole of TreeClan—to Nightpaw. Her thoughts instinctively turned to the dark-pelted apprentice, so much like Magpiewing in appearance, but so much like Pinkcloud in personality. The young tom’s father must have caught on to the switch in Bluejay’s train of thought, because not too long afterward he was saying all of the right things. He admitted that Bluejay was stronger than him, and it took everything she had to keep from softly laughing. She had done a number of things that she should’ve regretted—mainly getting involved with Rushwhisker—prior to her change in path, but she missed him on a regular basis, and that didn’t make her strong.
However, there was also a lot of good that Bluejay had amounted to in her short life. It was so much like her to put her own happiness, and her own achievements, on the back burner so she could focus on her Clanmates instead. “I will always be there for him, Magpiewing. You can count on me to be a part of his life, and to act like a mother figure for him, until you’re ready.” Even after he was ready, Bluejay would be a part of his life. Nightpaw was immeasurably important to her, and she’d never stop being involved in his upbringing. Initially, his new family with Mockingbird had unsettled her, because he already had fatherly duties to another cat in TreeClan that he was neglecting. However, after he invited her into his reasoning behind the relationship, she visibly softened. Of course it was hard for him. He deserved to have someone like Mockingbird, someone who cared about him, to help him move on from the death of his first mate. Pinkcloud wouldn’t want him to suffer, she reminded herself, and she didn’t want that, either.
“I don’t think you’re terrible.” Bluejay said, following his flighty eyes around camp. Was he worried about Nightpaw overhearing? She assumed so, and she supposed she couldn’t blame him for that—it would be a tragic way for the young apprentice to find out. “I’m glad that Mockingbird has helped you recover from Pinkcloud’s passing, and your kits… they’re beautiful.” She meant every word. Bluejay always had a soft spot for kits. She knew that Lionstar was uncomfortable with Mockingbird’s ties to a certain exiled TreeClan warrior, but Mockingbird had done nothing wrong—just like Sootmask had done nothing wrong—and they deserved to have families in TreeClan that they could be proud of.
Her thoughts inevitably returned to Nightpaw, and she fixed Magpiewing with a look of the utmost seriousness. As a medicine cat, she was forbidden to have kits of her own, but that didn’t bother her anymore now that she had him. In more ways than one, she did feel like his mother; but of course she wouldn’t strip that responsibility, that privilege, from her sister. He was a fascinating, bright young pupil, and she knew he’d accomplish great things. “If you do decide that you want to tell him…” She didn’t say his name, equal parts because he would know who she was referring to and because she respected his wishes to keep it quiet for the time being. “…please be careful. I want to be there for him as he transitions.” She had no clue that Magpiewing’s motives were nothing like they seemed, but thankfully for his son, that didn’t change how attached the medicine cat was to him. She felt overwhelmingly protective of his well-being, and she wouldn’t let anything—or anyone—hurt him. If Magpiewing reached out to him, it would need to be done correctly, and Bluejay would see to it that it was.
In the moment we're lost and found
I just wanna be by your side
If these wings could fly
For the rest of our lives 675 - @zen - Notes |
|
