Post by Fawn on Jun 9, 2013 13:02:41 GMT -5
39 Moons || TreeClan || Tom
Don't look at me like that, Willow. The innocent, inquiring glow of her eyes nearly cemented him to his spot, willing him to stay put and tell her everything she wanted to know, to just let all of the memories he'd spent so long repressing to rise to the surface once more.
...But he couldn't. Not right now. The shock was still too fresh, and his feelings were a ridiculous convoluted jumble that would require at least a full day to sort out. Was he happy she was alive? Of course. He was still suspended in disbelief, however, that somehow she had returned in two years. Where had she been and what had she been up to for two entire years? Where had she gone that day she was supposedly attacked? Lionstar could still recall the blood that had littered the ground and splashed across the leaves, and he could still remember that sickeningly strong lurch of his stomach and the fragmenting of his heart, heart and soul in so much pain.
He was feeling a different kind of pain now, but that still didn't change the fact that she was the cause of it; Lionstar didn't dare allow his gaze to linger on her for too long, afraid she would convince him to talk even when, for his own personal well being, knew he shouldn't. Stealing a glance at Grayowl, however, was like dropping ice down into his stomach. Why does she have to remember you instead of me? Solidifying Lionstar's decision to stay out of the conversation, he resisted the urge to sigh. "I'm sorry, there is a lot of reconstruction that needs doing, I'm sure Grayowl can fill in some of the gaps in your memory for now. Perhaps later, we can properly catch up." The golden tom's mew was friendly and denoted his departure, a warm dip of the head in the direction of the siblings - though it was obviously meant for one cat more so than the other - his paws feeling numb as they turned him towards the direction of the elders' den. He would spend a bit of time patching and reworking the brambles to make a more secure den for their most senior Clan members - even if all he wanted to do was go back to his den and sleep all of this off.
Still, he'd made the excuse that he was busy, and slinking away to catch some shuteye in the safety of his den was not very admirable of him, was it? Heh. Even now, with her identity just now revealed to him, Lionstar was still running himself through hoops in order to not look bad in front of her. Even if Lionstar disliked Grayowl for reasons he had trouble explaining, he hoped the cold gray tom would jog her memory somehow, as by mere touch alone he'd already restored to Willowfur a small portion of her former self.
This wasn't a decision made so he could trust Grayowl, it was a decision made because he couldn't trust himself not to get his heart broken unintentionally by something that wasn't Willowfur's fault. If she couldn't remember him...then... There was nothing either of them could do about it, besides hope.