[Fate Admin]

Boneshadow’s vigil was a sad affair, on more than one count. Ravenstar was in shock, she knew it, somewhere in the back of her mind. Halfmask had come to her, racing into camp with Frogpaw and Grimpaw on her heels, their fear scent preceding them all. Demon… Demon had killed her deputy, her lifelong friend who was the closest thing she had to a littermate, a brother who had grown up with her and been there for her whether she asked him to be or not. She had simply stared at the young warrior who had told her this, for a very long moment, before racing out of camp, following that fear scent back to its source. All she had found was blood and tufts of what she knew to be Boneshadow’s fur. They did not even have a body to bury. Demon had….

She had lost control then. He was gone, she did not even have a body to mourn over, and how did his end come about? As prey for that StarClan forsaken monster cat. She had raced after the stinking odor of the monster that had turned her closest friend into his prey only to be tackled by one of her own Clanmates, held down and dragged back to camp writhing and snarling at the foxhearted crowfood eaters to let her go. She did not even know which of her Clanmates had been the ones to drag her back against her will, so lost to her rage and grief was she then, but that was probably for the best… she could not punish them unfairly.

They had taken her to her den and put a guard on her to ensure she would not run after the monster cat and get herself killed, but her blind fury was ebbing by then. She had curled up on her nest and refused to speak to anyone. Smokefur had come to see her and had tried to push herbs on her, probably for the shock, but she had refused to eat them. She wouldn’t even look at her sister. As night had fallen she had finally roused herself, uncaring of her disheveled appearance, and padded out of her den, reassuring her guards that they were no longer needed, her moment of stupidity had passed.

By then the whole Clan already knew that Boneshadow was gone, but she leapt up to the Boulder Ledge to announce his death anyway. He had died a hero, saving Halfmask, Frogpaw, and Grimpaw from the fate he had taken upon himself. She had leapt down after the announcement, to many shocked faces and murmurs. Clearly the Clan had been expecting her to name her deputy, with moonhigh fast approaching. Well, she would name her deputy when she was well and ready and not before and the Warrior Code could kiss her fluffy tail. With that she had taken up a position in the middle of camp with her head bowed, but not before seeking out Smokefur and Grimpaw to ask that they sit vigil with her during the night. They might not have a body to sit vigil over but Ravenstar would sit there all night and pay her respects to her friend. May StarClan light your path, Boneshadow… may you find good hunting, swift running, and shelter when you sleep….

[Deleted]

Smokefur had witnessed the scene of Boneshadows death herself, there was no way she couldn’t have gone to see. Something was powerful about the event and it drew her to the sad patch of forest, as long as Boneshadow lived in the memory of the Nightclan cats the area would always be one shrouded in grief and horror. It may have been deemed unsafe but Smokefur knew she had work to do, her sister needed her now more than ever. Not her leader, the leader part of Ravenstar had been stripped away and what was left was her sister shocked and defenseless from the waves of pain and horror the incident would bring. Boneshadow would have been her shield in this situation if it was possible, but with him gone Ravenstar was bare as she ever would be. Smokefur knew she was the only cat now with the power to protect Ravenstar, and she brought back the tools she would need to do her best. She worked in silence before baring the fruits of her labor to her sister, she knew that the lack of a body to pay respects to would psychologically destroy Ravenstar so she did what she could. Exiting her den Smokefur gently laid down at Ravenstars feet, a strip of bark with a sweet smelling flowing in the center and tufts of Boneshadows fur cleaned of blood from the scene surrounding it. The flower was stale of course, it had bloomed many months before the harsh leafebare but Smokefur hoped the scent of the lavender would help calm Ravenstar. Lying down beside her sister Smokefur hoped so desperately as she nuzzled Ravenstar gently that paying respects in effigy to her irreplaceable friend was a step in the right direction.

[Deleted]

Fools in love they think they're heroes
Cause they get to feel more pain
I say fools in love are zeros

Pure white paws pressed against the cold Earth as the young tom, Grimpaw, treaded. As the tom moved, his head was head bent so low that his un-torn ear kissed the dusty ground. His once stunning brilliant yellow eyes were no longer colored with light and feeling and were half closed and sullen instead. Icy cold wind breathed against his free, matted pelt but the tom cared little and his body did not quake with fear of the cold as it once did. Numb, broken, and deep in grieving, the tom treaded. That was all he could muster.

The dark gray apprentice had been summoned to sit vigil with Ravenstar and Smokefur for the night to grieve the loss of Ravenstar's best friend and the clan's deputy, Boneshadow. The only thing that the tom felt was grief. In another situation, the tom might've questioned Ravenstar's motives for calling the apprentice out, but such topics were not on the solemn tom's mind. Grimpaw had simply figured that Ravenstar had recognized Grimpaw's feelings after Boneshadow had given his life to Demon to protect he, Halfmask, and Frogpaw and had not questioned the matter any longer.

Yellow eyes flicked open long enough to peer at the two sisters crowding around bark smelling sweet and strongly of the passed deputy's scent. Padding forward, wordless, Grimpaw approached the pair and settled next to Ravenstar and Smokefur. The tom's long tail curled up around his paws as he sat and wind and cold pushing angrily against the apprentice's thin cat.

Grimpaw sat, complaint-less and emptily and gazed at the bark before him. What remained of Boneshadow's body was in this precious artifact. Grimpaw was glad that there was something for them. The young tom bent down and pressed his nose up against the lavender smelling bark, breathing in the fresh scent of Boneshadow for the first time and pressing upon it his upmost thanks.

Though now was no such time for the gray and white apprentice to bring up such matters, Grimpaw's grief for the deputy lay in the deputy's deeds mingled in with his own (or lack there of). Grimpaw felt that there must have been something that he could have or should have done that would have saved the honorable and heroic deputy from his fate. If only I had returned back to camp faster or had chosen to stay with Boneshadow instead of returning to camp for help. If only we had not gone that way on that day, Grimpaw thought, turning away from the bark and breathing deeply inwards, his tired eyes peering up at a sky full of blinking stars.

If only the cat in Demon's jaws had been me, not Boneshadow. Maybe the clan could be spared from this grief, Grimpaw thought, wishing up to the blinking stars that Boneshadow would return to them and take him instead.

GRIMPAW

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[Fawn]

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[atrb=style, background-color: #1A1A1A; border-radius: 35px;] [STYLE=height: 250px; width: 460px; margin-top: 6px; opacity: 0.7; border-radius: 30px; background-image: url(http://i90.photobucket.com/albums/k258/nuttybuddy5/Warriors/Frogpaw-Header.jpg);][/style][STYLE=font-family: times new roman; font-style: italic; font-size: 45px; color: #E7E1CD; text-transform: lowercase; margin-top: -30px; letter-spacing: -3px; opacity: 0.99; text-shadow: 2px 2px 2px #000000;]YOU ONLY GOT ONE LIFE TO LEAD[/style][STYLE=font-family: arial; font-size: 12px; margin-top: -10px; color: #CEC6AA; letter-spacing: 2px; text-transform: uppercase;]SO DON'T TAKE FOR GRANTED THE LITTLE THINGS[/style] [STYLE=font-size: 11px; font-family: arial; margin-right: 13px; margin-left: 13px; text-align: justify; background-color: #99FF99; padding: 13px; color: #000000; margin-top: 6px; opacity: 0.95; margin-bottom: 1px; border-bottom-right-radius: 30px; border-bottom-left-radius: 30px;] She did not have the strength to sit up with dignity, mourning for a cat whose body they could not even bury. It was as if any semblance of emotional or physical strength had fled her dappled body, Frogpaw reduced to a small, far too quiet creature with her chin resting against her paws, golden eyes awash with an unbearable, soul-shattering pain. First Darkpaw had been injured to protect her - now Boneshadow, the Clan deputy, her mentor, the cat she'd respected more than anything, had died to save her and a few other Clanmates. It was impossible not to think of what 'should have happened', of a better alternative to the nightmare she and the rest of NightClan were living in; Eyes roving to their corners, Frogpaw caught a glimpse of Ravenstar's somber, shellshocked visage, and the younger she-cat visibly flinched, as though struck by the power of their Clan Leader's sadness. It was unbearable. It was unbearable. Frogpaw scrunched her legs tighter, curling up into a ball, ignoring the presence of her older brother Larchclaw, and her quiet, somber sister Willowflame. He had been their uncle too, but he hadn't died for them, he hadn't been their mentor, he hadn't been so close, and someone for them to look up to... How was it possible to regret so much in the course of one short life? Frogpaw regretted all the times she acted up, all the times she may have come off as disrespectful or bored, all the times she poked fun at their morning meditation. Why didn't I listen better? Why didn't I train harder? Why didn't I turn back? It would have been easy to say that she was just following Boneshadow's orders when he told her to run back to camp, but that wasn't true. She had run because she was scared. She had run because she was a coward; no apology so great or so sincere could ever make this better, not even if she said it a hundred times. Feeling a hard lump form in her throat, Frogpaw would have thrown herself at demon a hundred times over, no matter how painful the demise, if it meant Boneshadow could be alive. A Clan mourning the death of a foolish apprentice was the lesser evil to a Clan and Clan leader broken at the loss of a deputy, a pillar of strength. Apart from Boneshadow's niece, there were two other cats who had been deeply affected by the deputy's sudden, but no less heroic death. Snowlark, who longed to go press her muzzle into Smokefur's plush silvery coat, longing to hear that everything would be okay, that Boneshadow was in a better place, sat in silence by the entrance of the warrior's den. She had...almost fallen in love with him, she was sure of that; they could've been something... But she wasn't necessarily mourning the loss of a relationship; she was mourning the loss of a beloved pillar of strength for a Clan she had come to give her whole heart and soul to. Snowlark sighed softly around the lump in her throat, body still as she sat in the cold, determined to keep her own vigil as the family of Ravenstar or Boneshadow gathered in the center of camp instead. Back behind Ravenstar and Smokefur, was a solid black tom with mismatched eyes, his expression somber, with subtle hints of anger in the spiked end of his tail, which wove irate swished patterns against the earthen floor, his fur bristled against the chill of his leader's mood rather than the cold itself. While there was no deputy, while the Clan was in tatters of this awful shock to their system, Blackwolf would be there to pick up the pieces. Not just Ravenstar, either, the sturdy tom observed as he saw Grimpaw take his place beside his two sisters; it was an experience Blackwolf had never had, a cat dying so that he could live. I wouldn't want that, no matter who it is or what situation. He had decided with definite resolution; though he would stubbornly cling to life, given the chance, Blackwolf would not be comfortable with that kind of weight on his conscience. It would dog him through the rest of his hopefully long, fulfilling life, and that just wasn't something he wanted to deal with. No... If he had to die before his time, then he was going to die in a fantastic blaze of glory, just as Boneshadow had - either fighting and dying for his Clan, or taking out as many enemies as he possibly could. They would sing his praises then, and he would be able to watch over them all from StarClan - Shadepaw, Harepaw, Grimpaw, Clawstorm, Dogfang, and even Ratfur - and every time a wolf howled somewhere in the distance, they'd know it was him. The Clan may have lost a powerful figurehead, but Blackwolf had gained something in all of this grief and confusion and oppressive sadness; a new respect for Boneshadow that he had not had whilst the cat had been living, and a little more understanding of what it meant to truly live and die by the code. [/style][STYLE=width: 400px; text-align: center; font-size: 9px; color: #565656; text-transform: uppercase; margin-top: 0px; font-family: arial; letter-spacing: 3px; opacity: 0.9;]made by kiwii at btn & ote![/style]